Monday, July 4, 2011
1 week ago....
My daughter, Jessica Victoria Pares, was born. She was born on June 27th, 2011 at 4:12 pm weighing 7 lbs 5 oz at 19 inches. I prayed, I wished, and I dreamed of her all my life. I dreamed of being a singer, a nurse, a politician, a principal, and a teacher. I could compromise on any of those, but not being a mother. It is truly a blessing to finally be a mother to such a beautiful young lady (aka "Lady Jessica" by her Grandpa - my dad).
I finally wanted to get her birth story written up for her to get it off my chest before I forget. I'm sure she will want to read it just as my mom shared my birth story when I was a baby. I'm going to try to keep it somewhat short? It really isn't that dramatic.
Jessica was due on Father's Day, June 19th. I woke on June 19th in tears because she hadn't come yet. I started to doubt my body and question whether or not I did something wrong during my pregnancy not to have her come on time. I know ... It is very silly but I was done at that point. That night, like several other days, I called the doctor complaining of contractions that I thought were labor only to learn it was nothing... as usual. By mid week, I was at peace since we scheduled my induction for Monday June 27th. I had a little more energy now and decided to go on a cleaning spree of my house, do a crazy dance video, eat my sis-n-law's delicious eggplant parm, and get a few walks in. I even drank a couple glasses of wine -- as prescribed by my doctor since I was in so much pain and frustrated.
I was so excited on the night of June 26th. Michael and I went out to have a nice dinner. My goal was to get a good night's rest and be ready for a phone call from Labor and Delivery. I could get a call as early as 4:30 am or as late as 3:30 pm. So no, of course I didn't sleep. This was not because of my anxiety or excitement. I started having back pain and other symptoms that were just "off". I was uncomfortable but ignored them because of all my other false calls. Around 5 am, I noticed my contractions seemed to be closer together... but I also thought that was a fluke.
Finally I got my call at 8:30 am. We got ready to go and by the time we left, I was definitely in "don't mess with me" mode. We arrived by 9:45 am. It took us about 30 minutes to get settled in. I met all the doctors and nurses. We discussed my birth plan and all the other logistical stuff. It took 1 hour just for them to keep track of Baby J's heartrate. My parents arrived around 11 am. At about 11:15 am, it was very clear my contractions were much stronger and now were 2 minutes apart. I breathed through every one with my eyes closed while listening to my favorite song made by my brother. My mom was getting a kick out of watching me silently handle my contractions. I didn't find it funny at all. I came in the hospital at 1 cm and now was 4 cm.
Then Baby J's heartrate went down. Her heartrate has been steady in the 140's for the last 3 months. She dropped below 100 and in hearing that, I lost it. I started hyperventilating, my contractions got stronger and were now 1 minute apart, and then a rush of docs and nurses came flying in. They put tubes here and there and then the oxygen mask. My water broke and the contractions lost it. Michael and the nurse did SO well to calm me down and keep me focused. At this point I was 7 cm dilated. I felt better because her heartrate went back to normal. Now it was about handling the contractions. I dealt with them for a while longer but with them now being 30 seconds apart, I asked for an epidural. It didn't get it for another 40 minutes. There was a student involved which made the process even longer. These were my WORST contractions but I knew that if I moved during this process, I could be screwed. So I toughened up.
Epidural in ... I was in la la land. It was like the greatest glass of wine to my lower half.
15 minutes later - doc says, "ready to have a baby? you are fully dilated" I said to him "are you joking?" So everyone took their time to get everything ready to let the baby come down some more.
4:00, I started pushing. 4 pushes and 4:12 pm... she was out.
She was wisked away quickly because she did do her first poopy in utero, so they had to clean her up. I was looking at the face of Michael and my mom to see if she looked okay. I heard her cry and focused on that the whole time as I had to have some pretty extensive repairs done.
We were moved to recovery about 1 hour later and I finally had Baby J in my arms. I was in heaven and truly blessed.
We came home about 72 hours later. My stay at the hospital was fantastic. Everyone was so helpful. Nurses were there for guidance and educating me. I milked it all up. Mike and I enjoyed our time together with her in our room.
She is now home. I am definitely sleep deprived as we learn this "food" thing. I've been in a ton of pain the last week, but nothing could outdo my love for her. I could stare at her all day (as I am right now). She is beautiful and healthy. I am blessed. Thank you Jesus for giving me this wonderful gift.
Well that was sorta short...
One of these mornings, you're gonna rise up singing
Then you'll spread your wings
And you'll take to the sky
But 'til that mornin'
There's a nothin' can harm you
With daddy and mammy standin' by...